Saturday, August 13, 2005
I should have posted last night. I had what I wanted to say all worked out in my mind...but I fell asleep as I feel I may do again while attempting to post. Now last night has been filed away in the already faded memory section of my brain along with the other soccer and downtown nights and adding to the randomness. Highlighters proclaimed the love of friends saying goodbye on car windshields and a random downtowner taught me more about the author of James and the Giant Peach than....
I was having a rough day; I knew it wasn't kind what I was doing but I never meant to hurt her. I didn't realize how personally she would take it. I forget that with her it's different. But tonight was good; I think she enjoyed herself. I enjoyed it despite being one of the youngest there. The music was good and I saw people I hadn't seen since the last shindig. Then again, I didn't even know half the people and it seemed meant for those older than me so I didn't stay long. Wandering the streets, I learned so much about her. For the first time I heard her heart and what she believed. We connected... and with less than a week to go and her starting a full time job Monday. Great timing, but I guess bad timing is better than never.
There will be time, there will be time
to prepare a face to meet the faces you will meet
Just 6 days. Can you believe it? I'm ready, but it seems like so little time when I think of all I need and all I want to do. So little, yet so much.
I have measure out my life with coffee spoons.
This first year went by so fast. The summer felt like it was creeping by, but looking back it feels like it all happened in a blink.
Time present and time past
Are both perhaps present in time future,
And time future contained in time past.
If all time is eternally present
All time is unredeemable.
What might have been is an abstraction
Remaining a perpetual possibility
Only in a world of speculation.
What might have been and what has been
Point to one end, which is always present.
Footfalls echo in the memory
Down the passage which we did not take
Towards the door we never opened
I seem to be fixated with time and Eliot lately. Little redunant to say that, no?
To be honest I should tell you this post has been edited. There was more, but reading it again I thought it too .... Oh I don't know how to put it. Personal? Real? Private? to post for anyone to see. If curiosity gets the best of you, I don't mind talking about it one on one, but not here.
I was having a rough day; I knew it wasn't kind what I was doing but I never meant to hurt her. I didn't realize how personally she would take it. I forget that with her it's different. But tonight was good; I think she enjoyed herself. I enjoyed it despite being one of the youngest there. The music was good and I saw people I hadn't seen since the last shindig. Then again, I didn't even know half the people and it seemed meant for those older than me so I didn't stay long. Wandering the streets, I learned so much about her. For the first time I heard her heart and what she believed. We connected... and with less than a week to go and her starting a full time job Monday. Great timing, but I guess bad timing is better than never.
There will be time, there will be time
to prepare a face to meet the faces you will meet
Just 6 days. Can you believe it? I'm ready, but it seems like so little time when I think of all I need and all I want to do. So little, yet so much.
I have measure out my life with coffee spoons.
This first year went by so fast. The summer felt like it was creeping by, but looking back it feels like it all happened in a blink.
Time present and time past
Are both perhaps present in time future,
And time future contained in time past.
If all time is eternally present
All time is unredeemable.
What might have been is an abstraction
Remaining a perpetual possibility
Only in a world of speculation.
What might have been and what has been
Point to one end, which is always present.
Footfalls echo in the memory
Down the passage which we did not take
Towards the door we never opened
I seem to be fixated with time and Eliot lately. Little redunant to say that, no?
To be honest I should tell you this post has been edited. There was more, but reading it again I thought it too .... Oh I don't know how to put it. Personal? Real? Private? to post for anyone to see. If curiosity gets the best of you, I don't mind talking about it one on one, but not here.
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